I don't know if this happens everywhere, but it happens a lot around where I live in Dallas. People constantly are begging for money. There was a time when I would help out, but that was a long time ago.
It used to be that I would drop a couple of bucks on one of these people per week and then politely tell others that I couldn't help them. However over the last few years as I've become more and more suspect of their motives, I've become less and less tolerant of their solicitations. There have been a few times when I've offered to buy a meal for those wanting money and they aren't interested. So, my skepticism abounds.
Lately whether it's an auto parts store or grocery parking lot or walking around the neighborhood and if I see a homeless person coming my way, I just wave them off or sternly say "no" to them before they even ask. I've heard my share of the could I borrow a buck for food or I need some money to fix my broken down car to get my family up the road to Sherman stories. I've really tired of being hassled on an almost daily basis.
The thing is, how can you know when somebody is legitimately needy and will do the right thing with your money? I'm told that most of these donations go to feed drug and booze habits and nothing more. Who am I to say? I just know that I learned a bit of a lesson in being civil and humane this week.
I was at a gas station along Central Expressway north of downtown Dallas where I often fill up and it's a place worked heavily by beggars. This was the case once again. I saw the guy making his way from car to car at each gas pump, so I jumped into the cab of my truck and closed the door and picked up the phone so as to not have to engage with the man hoping he would just move on. He didn't.
The man walked up to the driver's side of my truck and as he approached me I put the phone to my ear and gave him a dismissive wave away to say I wasn't interested. He became angry. He shouted at me, "What do you think I am a dog that you can just shoo away?" Well of course I didn't mean it that way, but obviously that's how he took it. My reaction was shout back that I wasn't interested and to move on. He did after a few seconds and a few more angry comments.
I finished filling my tank and drove away. Was the guy overreacting? Was he mentally ill? Whatever the case, the whole incident gnawed at me. It bothered me.
I like to think of myself as compassionate and decent. So why did I just blow the guy off like that? It's because I'm constantly being hit on for money. Even so, how hard is it for me to politely decline? Not very. And that should be the way I operate. It's not been like that for a long time.
The run-in with the beggar reminded me that I can still treat a person like a person. I should treat others as I want to be treated. It's the old Golden Rule thing. And it's not too much to live by it. I don't have to give a homeless person my money, but I should at least give them the gift of dignity and respect.
That's what I'm thinking.
Rick Hadley
24/7 News
